NICE DEFINITIONS
Marriage: It’s an agreement where in
a man loses his bachelor degree and a woman gains her master.
Lecture: An art of transmitting
information from the notes of the lecture to notes of the student without passing
through their minds of either.
Conference: The confusion of one man
multiplied by the numbers present.
Compromise: The art of dividing a cake
in such a way that everybody believes he got the biggest price.
Tears: The hydraulic force by
which masculine will power is defeated by femine water power.
Dictionary: A place where divorce
comes before marriage.
Conference room: A
place where everybody talks nobody listens and everybody disagrees later on.
Ecstasy: A feeling when you feel you
are going to feel a feeling you have never felt before.
Classic: A book which people praise
but never read.
Smile: A curve that can set a lot
of things straight.
Office: A place where you can relax
after yours serious home life.
ETC: A sign to make others believe that you know more
than you actually do.
Committee: Individuals who can do
nothing individually and set to decide that another can be done.
Experience: The name men give to their
mistakes.
Atom Bomb: an invention to bring an
end to all inventions.
Diplomat: A person who tells you to
go to hell in such a way that you actually look forward to the trip.
Opportunist: A person who starts taking
bath if he accidently falls into a river.
Optimist: A person who while falling
from Eiffel tower says in midway “see I am not injured yet”.
Pessimist: A person who says that “O”
is the last letter in zerO , instead of the first letter in Opportunity.
Miser: A person who lives poor so that he can die rich.
Father: A banker provided by
nature.
Criminal: A Guy no different from the
others unless he gets caught.
Boss: Someone who is early when you are late and late
when you are early.
Politician: One who shakes your hand
before election and your confidence later.
Doctor: a person who kills your
ills by pills and kills you by his bill.
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